Suicide Squad’s Terrible Reviews are More Entertaining Than the Actual Movie

Suicide Squad, you know, that movie you’ve seen about 40 different trailers for over the past year, is finally coming out this week. The first reviews have started pouring in, are let’s say they’re less than raving. Critics are saying the movie is a mess with a hodgepodge of contradicting themes and inane plotlines that go nowhere. But hey, they can describe it much better than we can. Here’s what they’re saying:

In a year overloaded with comic-book movies, Suicide Squad just seems like more of the same. — Seattle Times

The movie itself is also a motley amalgamation—a strange blend of different tones, stories, and pacing all mashed into something that has cool individual elements, but never really comes together. — Gizmodo

Riding the trend is David Ayer’s day-glo superhero circus Suicide Squad, a gleefully nihilistic, abysmally messy romp that delights in upending the genre’s conventions and tries desperately to, like, totally blow your mind with its outré freak show. — Associated Press

Suicide Squad wussies out when it should have been down with the Dirty Dozen of DC Comics. Audiences complained that Batman v Superman was too dark and depressing. So director-writer David Ayer (End of Watch, Fury) counters with light and candy-assed. I call bullshit. — Rolling Stone

Suicide Squad is bad. Not fun bad. Not redeemable bad. Not the kind of bad that is the unfortunate result of artists honorably striving for something ambitious and falling short. Suicide Squad is just bad. — Vanity Fair

What a waste of a perfectly twisted Suicide Squad … let us count just some of the ways Suicide Squad is one of the most disappointing movies of the year. — Chicago Sun Times

On paper, this could have been the antidote to an increasingly codified strain of comic-book movies, but in the end, it’s just another high-attitude version of the same. — Variety

So much happens in David Ayer’s DC Comics adaptation Suicide Squad that by the end, it’s as if you’ve seen nothing. — Time

Let’s just hope Justice League can do a bit better than this.

Related